Yex = Sex + Yoga?
Hip Openers
I started to get serious about my yoga practice about a year and a half ago. It all started with this DVD hosted by fellow psychology student turned yogini to the stars, Ashley Turner.
Nothing too sexual about that huh? Except for maybe her mad camel toe in that unitard. Regardless, something she says in this video has always stuck with me.... about hip openers. She says, "Our hips are the largest store house of tension and emotion in our bodies," before guiding her viewers through pigeon pose. To me that's a duh when you consider all the amazing and terrible things we do with our hips daily. Perhaps yoga's emphasis on relieving tension in one's hips serves as a the most very basic reason why people can't help but sexualize yoga.
Yoga is Sexy
Moving onto less embarassing things than my work out DVD collection... I have enjoyed doing yoga classes in my community. Attendance is always overwhelmingly female. Some male friends have suggested that this is because physical exercise becomes difficult once they are aroused. So, apparently women bending over in tight pants tends to be a distraction. However, when discussing my love of yoga with a female acquaintance recently, she told me downward facing dog felt like a weird sex position.
Is anyone familiar with the controversy this video started?
Personally I find it REALLY impressive and inspiring, but it left some people saying that yoga shouldn't be sexy because that isn't the point. True - the point of yoga or any exercise is not to look sexy, however, with yoga it seems an inescapable side effect. Even the relaxed re-energized head space yoga puts me in can give me a sexier outlook on life. I do not think there is anything over-sexualized about this video. She is extremely fit and wearing a tiny bit of clothing, yes. But, c'mon, she's no Pamela Anderson. Show me a yoga video with a girl in fake lashes and fake boobs and I'll join in the complaining. Until then, I will ask what many other people were during this heated online debate: Is the idea of "The Yoga Body" real or a myth?
The Yoga Body
It seems that to search for an answer to this question is the key to unlock even more controversy. Yoga's explicit purpose is certainly to gain an awareness of our bodies and a love of them as well.
As yoga studio memberships, yoga dvd's, yoga mats, and other yoga products mean dollar signs for those who would wish to profit off of them, then like any marketable item there has to be an angle to sell. The video above screams success. Success gained through the well-practiced self-control that yoga provides. "Do yoga and you too can live in a pent house one day." This video was, in fact, a commercial for a New York gym.
Here's where I feel torn.. You don't have to look hot to be good at yoga. One of my favorite yogi's resembled the fat version of Buddha we all love. Some criticized his classes for not being vigorous, but he taught me the most about the best way to do yoga. If I ever want to complete a handstand successfully I am well aware that I need to build muscle in my arms first! Can't that an honorable goal? Strength has the power to excel practice of any exercise and the same is true for yoga! Being strong is what our society currently calls "hot." Whether its marketing, sexualizing, or praising the beauty of the female form... these are old arguments that don't limit themselves to just yoga.
Besides the benefits regular exercise has to offer our sex lives (that I addressed a previous post), yoga zeros in on a few areas that I think are definitely helpful in the bedroom. The biggest being flexibility. Yoga stretches not only muscle but ligaments, tendons, and fascia sheath around the muscle. All of this stretching releases lactic acid build up that is often the cause of stiffness, fatigue, and pain in our bodies meaning more endurance! After only eight weeks of doing yoga, participants can expect a 35% improvement to their flexibility. Think of all the new positions you can try - or better than try... actually feel comfortable in once you're crunched into them! Leaving you free to enjoy yourself without wincing! Yoga can also increase blood flow in the body necessary for arousal.
Another benefit to our sex lives is the strength it builds. Standing series poses build leg strength. Plank, downward and upward dog, and vinyassas build upper-body strength. Nearly every pose will help you improve your core and spinal strength. Cat and Cow is a great time to do some Kegals! Who has changed up a sex position early because their arm or leg got tired? Work on those chaturangas!
Partners are supposed to sit cross legged and stare into each others eyes and sync their breath. While this sounds excruciatingly awkward to me, Dr. Marty Klein says its a wonderful way to ignite passion, "The only time we ever think about breathing is when we have trouble doing it, yet conscious breathing can be a powerful aid in sexual growth." This synced breath stare down is supposed to last for ten whole minutes.
- The Sexpert
I started to get serious about my yoga practice about a year and a half ago. It all started with this DVD hosted by fellow psychology student turned yogini to the stars, Ashley Turner.
Yoga is Sexy
Moving onto less embarassing things than my work out DVD collection... I have enjoyed doing yoga classes in my community. Attendance is always overwhelmingly female. Some male friends have suggested that this is because physical exercise becomes difficult once they are aroused. So, apparently women bending over in tight pants tends to be a distraction. However, when discussing my love of yoga with a female acquaintance recently, she told me downward facing dog felt like a weird sex position.
Is anyone familiar with the controversy this video started?
Personally I find it REALLY impressive and inspiring, but it left some people saying that yoga shouldn't be sexy because that isn't the point. True - the point of yoga or any exercise is not to look sexy, however, with yoga it seems an inescapable side effect. Even the relaxed re-energized head space yoga puts me in can give me a sexier outlook on life. I do not think there is anything over-sexualized about this video. She is extremely fit and wearing a tiny bit of clothing, yes. But, c'mon, she's no Pamela Anderson. Show me a yoga video with a girl in fake lashes and fake boobs and I'll join in the complaining. Until then, I will ask what many other people were during this heated online debate: Is the idea of "The Yoga Body" real or a myth?
The Yoga Body
It seems that to search for an answer to this question is the key to unlock even more controversy. Yoga's explicit purpose is certainly to gain an awareness of our bodies and a love of them as well.
As yoga studio memberships, yoga dvd's, yoga mats, and other yoga products mean dollar signs for those who would wish to profit off of them, then like any marketable item there has to be an angle to sell. The video above screams success. Success gained through the well-practiced self-control that yoga provides. "Do yoga and you too can live in a pent house one day." This video was, in fact, a commercial for a New York gym.
Here's where I feel torn.. You don't have to look hot to be good at yoga. One of my favorite yogi's resembled the fat version of Buddha we all love. Some criticized his classes for not being vigorous, but he taught me the most about the best way to do yoga. If I ever want to complete a handstand successfully I am well aware that I need to build muscle in my arms first! Can't that an honorable goal? Strength has the power to excel practice of any exercise and the same is true for yoga! Being strong is what our society currently calls "hot." Whether its marketing, sexualizing, or praising the beauty of the female form... these are old arguments that don't limit themselves to just yoga.
Besides the benefits regular exercise has to offer our sex lives (that I addressed a previous post), yoga zeros in on a few areas that I think are definitely helpful in the bedroom. The biggest being flexibility. Yoga stretches not only muscle but ligaments, tendons, and fascia sheath around the muscle. All of this stretching releases lactic acid build up that is often the cause of stiffness, fatigue, and pain in our bodies meaning more endurance! After only eight weeks of doing yoga, participants can expect a 35% improvement to their flexibility. Think of all the new positions you can try - or better than try... actually feel comfortable in once you're crunched into them! Leaving you free to enjoy yourself without wincing! Yoga can also increase blood flow in the body necessary for arousal.
Another benefit to our sex lives is the strength it builds. Standing series poses build leg strength. Plank, downward and upward dog, and vinyassas build upper-body strength. Nearly every pose will help you improve your core and spinal strength. Cat and Cow is a great time to do some Kegals! Who has changed up a sex position early because their arm or leg got tired? Work on those chaturangas!
Then there is sex that is yoga ... or yoga that is sex....?
Tantric Sex
This has long been an area of sex that has truly pushed me past my comfort zone even to ponder upon, but that is all the more reason to find out more about it.
Tantra is a religious meditation that came out of medieval India. When thinking of ancient Indian sex rituals the Kama Sutra usually comes to mind. However, the Kama Sutra is a less titillating read than one might imagine. While it does offer practical bedroom advice, it is more of a guide about how best to conduct a loving relationship and household (these pieces often ignored by pervy Westerners).
Tantra is said to have influenced much of medieval Indian religious expression and was practiced by some Hindus and Buddhists. Hatha yoga (slow breath and focused postures) actually has its roots in Tantric practice. Sex is only one small piece of what Trantric meditation has to offer, however (again), this is what most pervy Westerners choose to focus on. What we think of as "Tantric Sex" is actually properly referred to as "Neo-Tantra" and boils down to a belief in sacred sexuality. Tantra practitioners seek to reclaim "sinful" behaviors. They see sexual energy as something to be harnessed for our use and thus sexual euphoria is an experience that can be transformative rather than just recreational.
I first heard about Tantra in the context that it was a sex technique designed to last a long time and create multiple orgasms for both parties. Awesome right? Even though it is meant to last longer than your average screw session, Tantric sex is designed to have a definite beginning and an end. What freaks me out about Tantric sex so much is how it starts....
Partners are supposed to sit cross legged and stare into each others eyes and sync their breath. While this sounds excruciatingly awkward to me, Dr. Marty Klein says its a wonderful way to ignite passion, "The only time we ever think about breathing is when we have trouble doing it, yet conscious breathing can be a powerful aid in sexual growth." This synced breath stare down is supposed to last for ten whole minutes.
Next, lovers are allowed to touch each other, kiss each other's face and neck, then proceed to slow love making where as much eye contact as possible needs to be made. Slow intercourse will help him last longer and will pique her arousal. In the middle of sex, partners are to return to a focus on their shared breath. Long slow breaths from the belly. A variation of sexual positions are encouraged. Both female and male dominant so to explore a variety of emotional states for both lovers as a practice of duality.
So what is this about multiple orgasms for men? Tantric sex distinguishes between orgasm and ejaculation. Certain Tantric techniques teach men to withhold their climax by squeezing their PC muscles. This allows them to stand on the edge of the cliff without going over, if you will. This will also prolonging the pleasure of orgasm because it will then be experienced in waves. For females the principle of chakra's is employed with the g-spot being considered a "sacred-spot" of sexual energy. Atala is the chakra located in the hips that governs fear and lust and is balanced through recognizing one's right to be sexual. Moving energy through the chakras is believed to be a source of pleasure and ecstasy. The final orgasm of Tantric sex is supposed to be a shared experience that leaves both partners engulfed in a near serene (nirvana like?) state.
Maybe one day I'll get brave enough to embark on that adventure...
Until then... Namaste,
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